A bit about my past...

I was sitting here thinking about how I was to expect anyone to understand some of the things I write if you do not know a bit about me and my past.

I do not share my past trials for pity but rather to hopefully encourage others. The purpose of me sharing my past to show God's mercy and sovereignty in my life.


I did some of my growing-up in Missouri where we believed in God and Jesus but I was never taught to have a relationship with Christ. My parents were great when they were on the right track. After they stepped off God's path, things went downhill. Drugs and alcohol were abused by my parents and the abuse reached its peak when I was about 13 years old. After my dad's addiction began, my mom became addicted to prescription medicine to fight her depression which led to her later addictions to meth. Being very hurt and searching for love in all of the wrong places, my mom began having an affair with a younger man who we had known for a short time.

I felt so much pain, so much hurt, so much emptiness, so much betrayal. Each day, I would wake my younger brother, Zach, up for school, make his lunch, make dinner, and even clean because I was trying to make his life seem as normal as it could be – I was trying to be his strength. Even though I loved my parents with my whole heart, I was angry with them; I was searching for a perfect love, a love that I knew would be there for me. I was lost, I was searching. I was young. I was hurting. I needed someone I could trust.

When things were rough, my best friends of 9 years at the time invited me to church. I agreed to go because I felt that it would be a great idea since I knew that God was “the source of happiness.” While sitting in church, I felt comfort through the worship and the preacher spoke about the parable of the lost sheep. I was told that Jesus is trying to guide me in the right way, and all I had to do was listen to His call and He would lead me into perfect peace. This is it! This is what I wanted! A way to not become who my parents were! A person to talk to that would not think poorly of my parents! On September 25, 2005 I started a relationship with my Savior. God’s timing is perfect.

Since I have been saved, the devil has tried numerous times to break me. Less than two months after being saved, my mom came to my school on a Friday and said, “Dylan, pack up your locker. Your grandparents are coming from Virginia to take you to live with them for a little bit because we are about to lose our second house this year.” God’s timing is perfect. The next day, my brother and I moved to Virginia so my parents could work things out and become stable again. The only thing keeping me from losing it was my new faith in God and that He would deliver us from anything that would not be good for us.

While Zach and I were gone, my parents began to restore their relationship, deciding to renew their vows and hopefully move away from all of the “madness.” In January 2006, my brother gave his life to Christ after a play at our new church. God’s timing is perfect. Six weeks later (February 26, 2006) my mom was shot and killed by the man she was having an affair with. Since I had a faith in God, I knew that there was going to be good to come of it because God never wastes a pain. The devil did not stop trying to bring me down. I was still getting teased at my new school for being so quiet and for not having many friends. The next Memorial weekend, the man who killed my mother, being out of jail on bond until his trial, was stabbed by my dad’s friend who claimed my dad paid him to do it. My Father is currently serving a 25-year sentence.

I knew God was there with His arms wide open, hearing all my prayers. Everything that God allowed Satan to do to me only strengthened me. Since my salvation day, God has strengthened and grown me. I now have an intimate relationship with Christ and I’ve grown close to my dad, who now loves the Lord too. My dad and I talk on the phone for at least 30 minutes a week and I am so thankful for that.  Now Christ is working in his life through me – it’s beautiful. Two years later, the trial for the man that killed my mom was taking place over my spring break. My brother, my grandparents and I went to Missouri to be there while it happened. Over the previous two years, God was at work in my life. God softened my heart so much that while I was in front of the court, giving my statement of how losing my mom has affected my life, I was filled with peace. I stopped reading, looked up at the jury and at the man that killed my mom, and said, “Because of my faith in God and the strength He has given me, I just wanted Mr. Whiteley to know that I forgive him for everything that happened.” Today, I pray that he too comes to know Christ soon. Maybe God will bless me with the chance to witness to him someday.

Each day is a battle against the devil and my flesh. Each day is a victory from the Almighty Lord. Galatians 2:20 is my life verse. “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

Too Many Green Lights. Time for Some Yellow Lights.

Friends. Essays. Test. Commitments. Obligations. Homework.  Family. Burdens. Entertainment. Sleep. 

It seems to be so easy to fill up each day with so much – sometimes even more than we realize.  Somehow we take it on, tackle it, and do it again day after day. I know I am not the only one guilty of this. 

So where do we draw the line? When do we stop? When do we just take a minute to step back and breathe? If you are like me, you do not do it enough. At all. 

It is exam week for me– a week full of all nighters, several cups of coffee, stress, and saying “see you later” to friends. It is when we have to balance our time better than we have. For others, stress is hitting hard because it is getting closer to the holidays, work is stressful, money is tight, or things at home are rough. Time for ourselves is less and less and we forget how important it truly is (Although cliché, it is so true). 

 I sat down to study today (no, not cramming for once) and it was the first time in a while where I just sat totally unrushed. I got my cup of coffee, turned on some great worship music, and took a deep breath. Almost instantly, I felt God’s presence. I was worshiping God and He was taking full advantage of the time I was giving Him.

In that moment, God pointed something obvious out. I need to slow down. I keep myself a little too busy and just forget to sit back and let God mold me for a minute.  After all, God says, “Be still, and know that I am God…” (Psalm 46:10)

How often did you see Jesus stress because of time? After all, Jesus knew the scriptures.” [God] has made everything beautiful in its time” (Ecc. 3:11). Jesus spent every second in worship of God.

Funny how we love to feel God’s presence and desire Him to work in us but we never give Him the chance.  Maybe it is time to start saying “no” to some things that cause the hecticness and stop telling ourselves that we will have a chance to slow down. If you plan on resting on Sunday, for example, odds are that you will find something else to fill that time with. Start today. Sit back and let God work in you – enjoy all of the beautiful things He has created. 

“My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.” (Exodus 33:14)